Santa Claus is a Woman

Category: Entertainment

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Santa Claus is a Woman **If you believe in Santa Claus you might want to stop reading now. My recent findings might just rock your Christmas world.** Photography:- Rachel Lovitt Song:-Christmas Tree Lady GaGa

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I believe there has been an eons old cover up surrounding Christmas, and more specifically surrounding the revered figure of Santa Claus. All pictures of Santa show a male figure, rotund in shape, with white hair and a full snowy beard. His job is depicted as keeping a list of not only who is good and bad each year, but what they want for Christmas, ensuring each gift is handmade and then delivering them all over the world - in one night.

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Well, I'm here to blow his cover. I have discovered - without a doubt - that Santa Claus is a woman. Think about it. No offense to my many male friends, but do you know ANY man who could keep up with the behavior (or even pay attention to?) of all the children in the world AND what they'd want for Christmas? This right here eliminates Santa as a man for me. For years my dad shopped for my mom on Christmas Eve. So the idea of any guy planning ahead, and making gifts all year long is clearly ludicrous. Keeping up with all the myriad of Christmas "musts" requires goddess like skills.

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Guys, I know this is crushing. Who wouldn't want to be Santa? This Christmas icon whizzes thru the sky at high speeds, racing 747's then rappels off of roofs, dropping down chimneys. And of course, eats lots and lots of cookies. I'll admit that these activities sound slightly more masculine perhaps. After all, my mother always taught me that the way to any man's heart is through his stomach. Most women might be substituting a Diet Coke at all those stops. And they wouldn't want you to leave cookies, as chocolate is a woman’s drug of choice. So I'll admit that the public image of Santa makes it easier to believe this favorite Christmas character is male.

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writing cards and delivering gifts for the past 25 years I've reached the stunning conclusion that it's all a cover up. The domain of Santa Claus - preparing for Christmas, remembering all the details, carrying out all the planning, thinking of all those people to be rewarded or thanked or encouraged, and then organizing this grand event is done all over the world every year by women. Not men. (usually, although I'd be happy to be proven wrong) But I'm sorry. I have seen my wife planning Christmas parties, family gatherings, thinking about creative and loving gifts, shopping for everyone from kids to relatives, baking cookies, wrapping presents,

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My wife insists I should add 2 more vital issues:- Santa is a woman because she doesn't make a mess in your house when she visits. Santa is a woman because while you are sleeping she is out working. So after doing the mad Christmas dash - once again - and LOVIN' IT, I'm here to be the first to break this story. Santa Claus is a woman. And "his" sleigh is a mini-van.

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