christ the king retreat

The Call to Love : 

The Call to Love Christ the King Staff Retreat September 16th 2011

Our Morning Together : 

Our Morning Together Set-up What are the students beliefs on love, sex and relationships? Theology of the Body for Teens- a way of having the conversation Break Towards an Inclusive Community: A Pastoral Approach to students with same-sex attraction.

Set-up and Participation : 

Set-up and Participation Mixing up the tables: check the back of my business card for your colour. Turn off cell phones now please. Be present to the morning and those in your group No side bar conversations Commit to the task at hand Monitor your participation and those in your group Listen for signals and respond promptly.

Ice Breaker : 

Ice Breaker Mindful of our Reflection Day Speaker, Terry Hershey, describe when and where you had an effective “pause” in your busy life… Share in two’s or three’s…

What do they believe about…. : 

What do they believe about…. Read the statements on the sheet provided. For each statement, provide an estimated percentage of the approval rating that was discovered in a national survey of 3500 Canadian teens.

Actual percentages : 

Actual percentages Consenting adults: 61% Consenting teens: 56% Sex before marriage LOVE: 82% Sex before marriage LIKE: 58% Same sex: 54% Same sex rights: 75% Extramarital: 9%

Actual percentages : 

Actual percentages Living together: 86% Living together and having children: 63% Abortion (rape case): 84% Abortion for any reason: 55% How close were your estimates? Discuss at your table

Theology of the Body : 

Theology of the Body The term comes from 129 weekly talks by Pope John Paul II from 1979 to 1984 An attempt to clarify the Church teaching on the sanctity of the body, creation, sexual union and marriage. Very dense theology and often misinterpreted.

Theology of the Body for Teens : 

Theology of the Body for Teens A resource that is based on John Paul II’s Theology of the Body A clear and concise approach, attractive in presentation. Can be presented in whole or in parts.

An excerpt from the videos : 

An excerpt from the videos Junior High DVD has eight sessions about twenty minutes in length; includes a parent session of a half an hour. Optional ‘sensitive topics’ section Senior High DVD has twelve 20-25 minute segments, and a forty minute session for parents; some segregated sessions for more in depth discussion The DVD’s do not “stand alone” but are there to supplement the lessons.

Where in the curriculum? : 

Where in the curriculum? Handout A : Junior High health and religious studies curriculum map Handout B: Senior High CALM and religious studies curriculum map (draft from Calgary Catholic and Christ the Redeemer)

What if I don’t teach it? : 

What if I don’t teach it? Provides the school with a common language and theology The implicit curriculum of the hallway, locker room, library…. For you as a parent For you as a Catholic Christian

Exploring TOB for Teens : 

Exploring TOB for Teens Pink & Orange: Chapter Overviews (Senior High) Red & Green: Student Chapter One (Senior High) Blue & Yellow: Student Chapter One (Junior High) Blank & Beige: Parent Guide Chapter One (SH)

Exploring TOB for Teens: One * One ? : 

Exploring TOB for Teens: One * One ? On your own, read over the material given to you noting the following: What do you see as a strength of the excerpt? Give a * to the sentence or section. What do you have a question about? Put a ? To the sentence or section In your small group, share one * and one ? Choose one * and one ? to share with the large group.

Break : 

Break Ten minutes please

Slide 16: 

A Resource For An Inclusive Community: A Teacher’s Guide For and About Persons With Same Sex Attractions

True or False? : 

True or False? Sexual orientation is a deep-seated dimension of personality. The Church encourages persons with same-sex attractions to seek therapy to change their orientation. The Church bases its teaching of human sexuality on Scripture. Sexual orientation is largely determined by environmental factors, predominantly parental influence. Persons with same-sex attractions are intrinsically disordered. The Church teaches that persons with same-sex attractions who engage in homosexual genital activity are immoral. Homosexual persons should be full, equal, participating members of the Christian community.

“First, and foremost, we want to highlight the theology and spirituality of communion…” RFIC #2 : 

“First, and foremost, we want to highlight the theology and spirituality of communion…” RFIC #2

“Before making practical plans, we need to promote a spirituality of communion, making it the guiding principle of education wherever individuals and Christians are formed…” R.F.I.C #2b : 

“Before making practical plans, we need to promote a spirituality of communion, making it the guiding principle of education wherever individuals and Christians are formed…” R.F.I.C #2b

“A spirituality of communion also means an ability to think of our brothers and sisters in faith within the profound unity of the Mystical Body, and therefore as “those who are a part of me”. R.F.I.C. #2d : 

“A spirituality of communion also means an ability to think of our brothers and sisters in faith within the profound unity of the Mystical Body, and therefore as “those who are a part of me”. R.F.I.C. #2d

“This makes us able to share their joys and sufferings, to sense their desires and attend to their needs, to offer them deep and genuine friendship.” R.F.I.C. #2d : 

“This makes us able to share their joys and sufferings, to sense their desires and attend to their needs, to offer them deep and genuine friendship.” R.F.I.C. #2d

“Let us have no illusions: unless we follow this spiritual path, external structures of communion serve very little purpose. They would become mechanisms without a soul, “masks” of communion rather than its means of expression and growth.” R.F.I.C. #2g : 

“Let us have no illusions: unless we follow this spiritual path, external structures of communion serve very little purpose. They would become mechanisms without a soul, “masks” of communion rather than its means of expression and growth.” R.F.I.C. #2g

“In this document, we are referring especially and particularly to a hidden minority: the students who are attracted to same sex persons.” RFIC #15 : 

“In this document, we are referring especially and particularly to a hidden minority: the students who are attracted to same sex persons.” RFIC #15

“We hope this support document will help to open minds and hearts to all persons we encounter in our journey.” RFIC #16 : 

“We hope this support document will help to open minds and hearts to all persons we encounter in our journey.” RFIC #16

“open minds and hearts” : 

“open minds and hearts” Using a pastoral approach in helping others understand Church teaching…

INFORMED CONSCIENCE : 

INFORMED CONSCIENCE Church Tradition & Scripture Empirical Studies Community Experience Personal Experience & Circumstance Intuition Feelings Reason Senses PRAYER & PRACTICE

“Any information given to students in the process of counselling must reflect the teaching of the Catholic Church.” RFIC #31 : 

“Any information given to students in the process of counselling must reflect the teaching of the Catholic Church.” RFIC #31

Pre-Presentation Perspective:1. Sexual orientation is a deep-seated dimension of personality. : 

Pre-Presentation Perspective:1. Sexual orientation is a deep-seated dimension of personality. TRUE

“The human person, made in the image and likeness of God, : 

“The human person, made in the image and likeness of God,

“can hardly be adequately described by a reductionist reference to his or her orientation.” RFIC #5 : 

“can hardly be adequately described by a reductionist reference to his or her orientation.” RFIC #5

Pre-Presentation Perspective:2. The Church encourages persons with same-sex attractions to seek therapy to change their orientation. : 

Pre-Presentation Perspective:2. The Church encourages persons with same-sex attractions to seek therapy to change their orientation. FALSE

“Church documents do not encourage a homosexual person to change their orientation.” RFIC #63 : 

“Church documents do not encourage a homosexual person to change their orientation.” RFIC #63 “difficult, if not impossible for an individual to change their sexual orientation…” RFIC #43

“Understanding one’s sexual orientation develops over a number of years, evolving from confusion to self-acceptance.” RFIC #46 : 

“Understanding one’s sexual orientation develops over a number of years, evolving from confusion to self-acceptance.” RFIC #46

Pre-Presentation Perspective :3. The Church bases its teaching of human sexuality on Scripture. : 

Pre-Presentation Perspective :3. The Church bases its teaching of human sexuality on Scripture. TRUE

Revelation in Sacred Scripture: : 

Revelation in Sacred Scripture: God created both male and female in the divine image (Gen 1: 27) The two become one body (Gen 2: 24) God blesses the man and woman and commands them to ‘be fertile and multiply’ (Gen 1: 28) Jesus reiterates these teachings from Genesis (Mk 10: 6-8)

Chastity : 

Chastity “Chastity means the successful integration of sexuality within the person and thus the inner unity of the human person in his / her bodily and spiritual being.” CCC#2357 “The virtue of chastity therefore involves the integrity of the person and the integrality of the gift.” CCC#2337

Pre-Presentation Perspective:4. Sexual orientation is largely determined by environmental factors, predominantly parental influence. : 

Pre-Presentation Perspective:4. Sexual orientation is largely determined by environmental factors, predominantly parental influence. FALSE

“Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained.” RFIC #7 : 

“Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained.” RFIC #7 “homosexual orientation is experienced as a given, not as something freely chosen.” RFIC #65

“Based on misinformation, many parents believe themselves to be responsible for their child’s orientation…” : 

“Based on misinformation, many parents believe themselves to be responsible for their child’s orientation…” “The unfortunate consequence is that many parents and family members end up rejecting their child.” RFIC #55

Always Our Children:A Pastoral Message to Parentsof Homosexual Childrenand Suggestions for Pastoral MinistersA Statement of the Bishops' Committee on Marriage and Family : 

Always Our Children:A Pastoral Message to Parentsof Homosexual Childrenand Suggestions for Pastoral MinistersA Statement of the Bishops' Committee on Marriage and Family

Pre-Presentation Perspective: 5. Persons with same-sex attractions are intrinsically disordered. : 

Pre-Presentation Perspective: 5. Persons with same-sex attractions are intrinsically disordered. FALSE

Intrinsically Disordered: : 

Intrinsically Disordered: Persons cannot be intrinsically disordered Not a psychological disorder God intends human sexual activity to be toward the mutual love of a man and a woman within the bond of marriage, with a commitment to be open to the transmission of life (Love/Life). Homosexual acts are dis-ordered in their nature from God’s plan for sexual activity.

“Any sexual genital expression outside the context of marriage is morally wrong.” : 

“Any sexual genital expression outside the context of marriage is morally wrong.” “The church teaches that extra-marital, pre-marital, and homosexual acts are morally wrong.” RFIC #9

“All of us are called to give witness to chastity, and with God’s grace, to the avoidance of behaviours which are contrary to God’s loving purpose in our lives.” RFIC #10 : 

“All of us are called to give witness to chastity, and with God’s grace, to the avoidance of behaviours which are contrary to God’s loving purpose in our lives.” RFIC #10

Pre-Presentation Perspective:6. The Church teaches that persons with same-sex attractions who engage in homosexual genital activity are immoral. : 

Pre-Presentation Perspective:6. The Church teaches that persons with same-sex attractions who engage in homosexual genital activity are immoral. FALSE

“We cannot judge the spiritual condition of another because we cannot know the other’s subjective disposition before God.” RFIC #61 : 

“We cannot judge the spiritual condition of another because we cannot know the other’s subjective disposition before God.” RFIC #61

“Although we can judge that an act is in itself a grave offence, we must entrust judgment of persons to the justice and mercy of God.” CCC #1861 RFIC #61 : 

“Although we can judge that an act is in itself a grave offence, we must entrust judgment of persons to the justice and mercy of God.” CCC #1861 RFIC #61

Jesus, Our Model:Unconditional love +Uncompromising truth : 

Jesus, Our Model:Unconditional love +Uncompromising truth

Pastoral Approach : 

Pastoral Approach

Pre-Presentation Perspective:7. Homosexual persons should be full, equal, participating members of the Christian community. : 

Pre-Presentation Perspective:7. Homosexual persons should be full, equal, participating members of the Christian community. TRUE

“A spirituality of communion also means an ability to think of our brothers and sisters in faith within the profound unity of the Mystical Body, and therefore as “those who are a part of me”. R.F.I.C. #2d : 

“A spirituality of communion also means an ability to think of our brothers and sisters in faith within the profound unity of the Mystical Body, and therefore as “those who are a part of me”. R.F.I.C. #2d

All who are called to Christian ministry in our Church are expected to live a lifestyle that honours Church teaching, and therefore represents leadership and stewardship for our Church : 

All who are called to Christian ministry in our Church are expected to live a lifestyle that honours Church teaching, and therefore represents leadership and stewardship for our Church

“All persons, whether homosexual of heterosexual, share the same rights and dignity and are called to live as God’s children.” RFIC #4 : 

“All persons, whether homosexual of heterosexual, share the same rights and dignity and are called to live as God’s children.” RFIC #4

“It is deplorable that homosexual persons have been and are the object of violent malice in speech or in action.” : 

“It is deplorable that homosexual persons have been and are the object of violent malice in speech or in action.” “Such treatment deserves condemnation from the Church’s pastors wherever it occurs.” RFIC #6

Discrimination: : 

Discrimination: Personal Institutional Societal “Discrimination based on sexual orientation in any form not only oppresses homosexuals but heterosexuals as well.” RFIC #27

“We hope this document will help us to give mutual support to all persons within our school communities : 

“We hope this document will help us to give mutual support to all persons within our school communities which will assist us in our struggle to build the kingdom of God,…

…a kingdom where people choose knowledge over ignorance, wisdom over fear, : 

…a kingdom where people choose knowledge over ignorance, wisdom over fear, a loving community over loneliness and isolation, and service over dominion.” RFIC #18

Small Group Discussion QuestionsDeveloping Empathy and Awareness : 

Small Group Discussion QuestionsDeveloping Empathy and Awareness If you had, or have, a child in your school who disclosed they are “gay”, how would/did you react? What would you do? What are the ‘labels/expressions’ commonly used in schools today to describe a person who is same sex attracted?

Labeling : 

Labeling An item that serves to identify – An ‘epithet’ Epithet – a term used as a descriptive substitute for a person’s name; an abusive or contemptuous word or phrase

Labeling : 

Labeling Labeling can be detrimental to one’s identity Labeling ‘classifies’ an individual rather than seeing the individual as a ‘whole person’ Labeling ‘segregates’ individuals from the community at large

Labeling : 

Labeling A question to ask: Does the label affect what the person can do? If a person is ‘disabled’ what does this tell you about the individual? (Are they hard working, do they have integrity, are they kind?)

Deeper Understanding : 

Deeper Understanding There was no one in my school for me to talk to about my issues. I felt completely alone and unsupported. I had nowhere to unload the burden I was feeling unless I ended it.

Suicide : 

Suicide Same sex attracted youth are more likely to attempt suicide than heterosexual youth - It is the leading cause of death for same sex attracted youth

Isolation : 

Isolation Same sex attracted youth report: severe isolation problems they experience social, emotional and cognitive isolation they are members of the only minority group to which their parents rarely belong

Depression : 

Depression Depression strikes homosexual youth more severely than their heterosexual peers

School Drop-out : 

School Drop-out Homosexual High School students reported dropping out of school because of harassment resulting from their sexual orientation

Violence : 

Violence Same sex attracted students report having experienced verbal harassment and/or physical violence as a result of their sexual orientation during High School

Discrimination : 

Discrimination Discrimination based on sexual orientation is a strong negative attitude toward homosexuals or homosexuality. It takes many forms: fear of associating with homosexuals, an irrational fear of being considered a homosexual, a violent dislike or hatred of homosexual persons, vulgar and abusive language and jokes about homosexuals, even persecution of homosexuals. RFIC # 19

Violence : 

Violence Some homosexual youth are forced to leave home because of conflicts with their families over their sexual identities “We lack the belief that parents can enjoy a good relationship with a homosexual son or daughter. When parents and families lack these constructive beliefs they tend to view themselves as failures and their offspring as deviant.” RFIC # 55

Students Coming Out : 

Students Coming Out Sexual behavior, especially adolescent experimentation does not necessarily reflect present or future sexual orientation (Bidwell & Deisher,1991). Realizing one is homosexual is not a singular event. It is a process becoming more aware of one’s sexual orientation and accepting it.

Students Coming Out : 

Students Coming Out “During puberty, identity confusion usually accompanies the onset of sexual attractions toward people of the same sex. The confusion is the result of dissonance between the person's inner feelings and the presentation of the world as heterosexual” RFIC #46

Denial : 

Denial Adolescents are getting negative, confusing and distorted messages regarding sexuality For same sex attracted adolescents, it can be quite confusing being stuck between the negative messages and what the adolescent is actually feeling. RFIC #46

Negative Self-image : 

Negative Self-image Homophobia is the fear, oppression and dislike of homosexuals. Internally, homophobia is the adoption and acceptance of these negative attitudes by gay men, lesbian and bisexuals. “Using unrealistic stereotypes to identify homosexual teenagers not only excludes most of them from consideration, but it also perpetuates the erroneous association between homosexuality and gender atypicality.” RFIC #53

What Schools Can Do : 

What Schools Can Do Provide information regarding the teaching of the Catholic Faith Community re: sexual orientation Promote a positive image of all persons regardless of sexual orientation Give guidance to students regarding chastity Take responsibility for protecting all youth from abuse and provide a safe learning environment Refer students for appropriate counselling support Respect the confidentiality of students and staff

What Staff Can Do : 

What Staff Can Do Do not tolerate remarks or harassment Listen and offer non-judgmental responses that will welcome further dialogue Take strong disciplinary action against those who victimize youth Provide a safe learning environment Recognize this is a ‘journey’ both for yourself and for others RFIC #67

Future Direction : 

Future Direction Where do we go from here? What support do we need in order to get there? How will we implement the document in our school? Other Concerns?