Unique Stressors for Couples with Disabled Children

Assisting couples in addressing the issues associated with having a disabled child, and the impact of this disability and lifestyle on the marital relationship. : 

Assisting couples in addressing the issues associated with having a disabled child, and the impact of this disability and lifestyle on the marital relationship. Elizabeth O. Hunter elizhu1@regent.edu

Child Mental Disability and Your Marriage : 

Child Mental Disability and Your Marriage This Educational Exercise will include: Overview of existing research regarding marriages of those with a special needs child Suggestions for parental assessment tools Suggested interventions which address: Intimacy Communication Problem Solving Importance of love, faith and work in the marital relationship

The Goals of this Educational Exercise : 

The Goals of this Educational Exercise Explore and implement effective strategies in the areas of: Communication Intimacy and Closeness Effective problem solving (The examples featured throughout the module are full length examples, viewers are not expected to view the entirety as a result of the time)

Overview of Existing Research : 

Overview of Existing Research The overall impact on the marital relationship: Effective problem Solving Intimacy Effective Communication

Research : 

Research Recent literature on marital adjustment suggests that the ability of partners to work together to meet the challenges presented by the special needs child predicts their marital well being and functioning (Bristol, Gallagher, & Schopler, 1988) The importance of marital couples working together provides support for the need of: Effective problem solving strategies within the marital relationship Effective styles of communication within the relationship

Research : 

Research Stress added to the overall marital functioning and lifestyle, increases the need for effective problem solving strategies within the couples with children born with disabilities. Raising a child with special needs creates increased strain and stress on the marital relationship, these continuous levels of stress are constantly weighing upon the couple. (Cummings, 1976)

Research : 

Research Lack of marital intimacy and the ability to work and communicate together has been noted in couples of special needs children (Floyd, Frank J, 1991). Such negative functioning was noted in the marital relationship, as well as in the parent-child relationship. (Floyd, Frank J., 1991). The negative functioning within these couples can be addressed through the implementation of effective communication, intimacy and problem solving strategies.

Research : 

Research Research indicates that special needs children often lead to crisis within the family, which required problem solving ability (Molsa, P.K., Ikonen, 1985). This lack of problem solving ability, as well as the ability to work together will be addressed for those couples parenting a special needs child.

Research : 

Research Child characteristics are included among the many variables that influence parenting behavior, those characteristics present in special needs children are likely to impact parenting style and behavior (Ripley, 2010). Raising a child with special needs has been associated with: Perceived difficulties with child management as depicted in child behavior problems. A marked strain on the marital relationship, as seen in a lack of ability to communicate and work together effectively. Lack of confidence regarding issues of parenting among couples when compared with that of children without special needs (Cummings, 1976).

Exploration of Problem Solving Strategies : 

Exploration of Problem Solving Strategies L.O.V.E. The L.O.V.E. acrostic consists of three skills and one basic principle that will assist couples in resolving their differences (Worthington,1999)

L.O.V.E. : 

L.O.V.E. L: Listen and Repeat O: Observe your effects V: Value your partner E: Evaluate both partner’s interests (Worthington, 1999, p.179) Example of the L.O.V.E. intervention

Exploration of Effective Communication Strategies : 

Exploration of Effective Communication Strategies T.A.N.G.O. The T.A.N.G.O. exercise assists couples in effective communication in that the partners learn to take turns speaking, learn to be brief, concise and focused on the issue at hand (Worthington, 1999).

T.A.N.G.O. : 

T.A.N.G.O. For the Speaker: T: Tell what happened, directly, and briefly A: Affected me ‘it affected me emotionally in this way…’ N: Nurture partner with a valuing statement For the Listener: G: Get it? Reflect what you heard from your partner to clarify your understanding O: Observe how this conversation is affecting both partners right now (Hopecouples.com, 1999) Example of the T.A.N.G.O. intervention

Exploration of Intimacy and Closeness : 

Exploration of Intimacy and Closeness C.L.E.A.V.E. The goal of this intervention is to teach couples various ways in which intimacy and closeness can be improved (Worthington, 1999).

C.L.E.A.V.E. : 

C.L.E.A.V.E. C: Change actions to positive L: Loving romance E: Employ a calendar A: Adjust intimacy elsewhere V: Value your partner E: Enjoy yourselves sexually (Worthington, 1999, p. 219) Example of the C.L.E.A.V.E. intervention

Importance of Love, Faith and Work in the Marital Relationship : 

Importance of Love, Faith and Work in the Marital Relationship There are three pathways to change a marital relationship: Faith Love Work The various interventions suggested attempt to increase love, faith and work within the relationship of those parents with a special needs child Problem Solving Communication Intimacy and closeness Special needs children add a significant level of pressure, stress and strain to the marital relationship. However, with the help of Love, Faith and Work, the marital relationship can remain strong.

References : 

References Bristol, Gallagher, & Schopler. (1988).Mothers and fathers of young developmentally disabled and non disabled boys: Adaptation and spousal support. Developmental Psychology, Vol. 24, 3. p. 441-451. Cummings, S. T. (1976). The impact of the handicapped child on the father: A study of mentally retarded and chronically ill children. American Journal of Orthopsychiatry,36, 246-255. Floyd, Frank J., (1991). Marriage and the parenting partnership: Perceptions and interactions of parents with mentally retarded and typically developing children. Child Development, Vol. 62(6), Dec, 1991. pp. 1434-1448. Homecouples.com. (2010).worksheets for couples no.6. Tango hand-held card. Retrieved from http://hopecouple.yolasite.com/resources /Hope_Handouts/TANGO_card.pdf Molsa, P. K., Ikonen, S. A. (1985). The mentally handicapped child and family crisis. Journal of Mental Deficiency Research. Vol. 29(4), pp. 309-314. Ripley, J. (2010). Lecture: Parenting. Regent University, School of Psychology and Counseling. Worthington, E. L. (1999). Hope Focused Marriage Counseling: A Guide to Brief Therapy.

Credits : 

Credits J. Michael Hunter Voice Over Beverly Powell Client A Amanda Plumb Client B Elizabeth Hunter Technical Support Jack Hunter Inspirational Support