Change the way you SEE,to change the way you BE. :Change the way you SEE,to change the way you BE. Think of three beliefs you have that are limiting you 1. belief you have about yourself (eg: I can't paint) 2. A belief you’ve about your child or any family member (eg: He is lazy) 3. A belief you have about the world or life in general (eg: People are selfish) Now for each of the above write down the opposite belief that you would like to adopt


One of the most touching and most profound comic strip written by watterson – what do you think? :One of the most touching and most profound comic strip written by watterson – what do you think? Feelings


What will you do or Say? :Two children are fighting over who will be the first one to paint. Vijay is constantly rocking his chair making a tweaking sound. Since everyone teases Kiran, she says she doesn't want to play because of stomach upset . Aditya is crying because he has lost his pencil box. You overhear Ravi saying to Jayant “Mr Rao is so cruel. I wish some day he falls terribly sick. “ Rahul doesn't want to do any activity as his friend Ajit has not come today. What will you do or Say?


Emotional Statement “That uncle is so mean!” :Emotional Statement “That uncle is so mean!” Deny Feelings How can you think like that Ask Questions Why do you say Like that? Give Advice or command You should not think like that about elders Give criticism This is bad. Is this how we respect others. Give explanation The Uncle was only trying to show you the right way to do it. Give solution C’mon here lets play this game (and soon you will forget about it) Show Pity Oh I am so sorry if he said like that to you. Acknowledge Feelings “That upset you”. “You feel so angry”.


Carl Rogers :In my early professionals years I was asking the question: How can I treat, or cure, or change this person? Now I would phrase the question in this way: How can I provide a relationship which this person may use for his own personal growth? Carl Rogers Understanding


Here is how to show empathy :Identify Feelings Acknowledge Feelings Stop Behavior – not feelings Here is how to show empathy


Identify Feelings :Identify Feelings Two children are fighting over who will be the first one to paint. Anxious, Worried, Vijay is constantly rocking his chair making a tweaking sound. Bored, Neglected, Lonely, Enjoying, Since everyone teases Kiran, she says she doesn't want to play because of stomach upset . Hurt, Upset, Anxious, Insulted Aditya is crying because he has lost his pencil box. Upset, Worried, scared Rahul doesn't want to do any activity as his friend Ajit has not come today. Lonely, Missing,


Acknowledge Feelings :Acknowledge Feelings Two children are fighting over who will be the first one to paint. You are Anxious for your turn Vijay is constantly rocking his chair making a tweaking sound. You seem to be bored Since everyone teases Kiran, she says she doesn't want to play because of stomach upset . Kiran is feeling Hurt Aditya is crying because he has lost his pencil box. Aditya is upset because he has lost his box Rahul doesn't want to do any activity as his friend Ajit has not come today. Rahul is Missing his friend


Acknowledge Feelings … Few more :“How can I be so stupid” Amol is banging on the door because he wants to go home. “I don’t feel like doing anything today” “I hate you” …. “go away” …. You are terrible “I find him totally disgusting” I don't like the new baby. This chapter is so dumb. I don’t know why I need to study this. I don’t want to. Acknowledge Feelings … Few more


Acknowledge Feelings … Few more :Child is taking a long time to finish his milk. I had a dumb birthday party. Anu's was so good I am not wearing the braces anymore. They hurt. I don't care what the dentist says. The bus driver is real rude. If I am just two minutes late, he leaves me in the school. This is such a tough lesson. I don't want to study grammar Somebody stole my new pencil. Acknowledge Feelings … Few more


Connection :Connection To be able to communicate, we first need a connection Build rapport, build relationship ~ FIRST


Emotional Development in children :Emotional Development in children Awareness (acknowledge) Identify feelings (vocabulary) Express feelings (acceptance) About me About things around me About the work I do About learning


The benefits :The benefits The more we empathize, the better WE feel We “say a lot” by listening for other people’s feelings Empathizing with someone’s “NO” protects us from taking it personally When kids feel right, they behave right. By acknowledge feelings we open the door for children to come out of their negative frame of mind.


Feelings :Feelings Children will forget what you said; Children will forget what you did; But they will not forget how you made them feel.