100 Days of Awesome 1.7

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Previously, on 100 Days of Awesome : ANASTASIA (V.O.): It never used to be this hard. All I had to do was snap my fingers, and they’d come a-running…

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ANASTASIA: I don’t get it! I’m just as good as I was when I was younger -- better! I know a lot more now. So maybe I’m not quite as -- as perky as I used to be, but there’s nothing wrong with a little -- a little patina .

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ANASTASIA (V.O.): Well, you know what? I’m sick of it! If they all think I’m a floozy, I’m going to corrupted files act like one!

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REBECCA: Um, no. No rubbing the belly. And maybe you should sleep on the couch tonight. PONG: But I thought you said you weren’t furious anymore. REBECCA: I did. But “I’m not furious” isn’t the same as “You’re forgiven.”

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Hi! It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Well, never fear! 100 Days of Awesome is back and awesomer* than ever. Although I am in no way trying to make it happen, this challenge is turning into quite the soap opera. I hope this is not a problem for my loyal readers. (Or even the occasional ones who drop by every now and again.) Also, remind me to take a new cover picture. We’ve had an age transition or two since this one was taken… The 100 Days Challenge was created by Callista over at the old Boolprop, and the only change I’ve made is to decide that it’s okay for Sims to go to work or school. *“Awesomer” is purely a subjective term. Not all readers will find the chapter awesomer than its predecessors.

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PONG (V.O.): I took the call this time. I mean, I’m in the same room as the phone anyway, for now. PONG (V.O.): I hope it’s just for now.

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REBECCA: We’re working on it. PONG: I’m trying, I really am. I just don’t know what to do. I mean, everything I’ve done has been because of our tasks. And, I might add, under protest. REBECCA: Like I said, we’re working on it. PONG: It would be nice to have this all taken care of by the time the baby gets here. REBECCA: We are working on it, Pong.

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ANASTASIA (V.O.): What? It’s nothing to do with me. ANASTASIA: Today’s task is to get struck by lightning. Again. Sheesh. Well, this time I’m gonna set the machine and somebody else can actually get struck. Now, how does this thing work?

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ANASTASIA: Okay, so you just do this… ANASTASIA: And this. ( as machine beeps rapidly for three seconds ) Is it supposed to do that? ANASTASIA: Oh, well. Here goes nothing. ( pulls lever )

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ANASTASIA: Oh, [bleep]! I’m pretty sure that’s not supposed to happen. ( bellows ) GET INSIDE, EVERYONE! NOW!

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PONG (V.O.): We really are working on things. I even changed my turn-ons to be more in line with Rebecca than Anastasia. But it was really hard, because they have the same coloring, pretty much the same skill set, and a very similar aesthetic. I mean that doesn’t leave very much that’s exclusive to my wife...

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REBECCA: Oh, like that helps. That puff just means that he huff really was attracted to huff her before, only he wasn’t puff saying anything.

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REBECCA: I don’t know if huff I’m going to forgive him yet. Right now he puff probably thinks I’m going to huff work on the community lot task and I huff hope it’s [bleep]ing got him worried, because it’s puff marry a rich sim and huff I absolutely would !

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ANASTASIA: The task was “Marry a Rich Sim,” only that’s not happening. ( scoffs ) I mean, we’re the second richest family in town. The only family richer than ours is Frederic’s and he’s already married. To a man .* *See Love, Frederic and Already in Progress nos. 51-54

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REBECCA: eeeee eeeEA AUUUUUUGH ! Pong, you son of a [bleep]! How could you do this to me? If you ever think about touching me again, I’llllllleeee eeeauuuu uugh !

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PONG (V.O.): One picture. PONG ( to baby ): Oh look! It’s Melanie! It’s Melanie! Yes it is! Hi Melanie! Hi hi! REBECCA: Okay, fine, you can hold her.

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PONG: I think that’s really great progress, that she’s letting me hold Melanie. I didn’t think she’d even let me be in the same room . Maybe we can have this all worked out before Melanie hits high school.

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ANASTASIA: Mom, do you know why there’s a strange man just staring at our floor? ABBEY: Mmmm? ANASTASIA: I mean, did you invite him over or something? He just walked in! PONG: Should I call the cops? ABBEY: Oh. No, no, don’t call. I think I know what’s going on.

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ABBEY (V.O.): Today’s task was to open a home business, and I made the call, but I didn’t expect anyone to show up yet. I don’t have anything to sell. Goodness, I don’t even have an open/closed sign yet! ANASTASIA (V.O.): Well, he’s here, and that staring at the floor is pretty creepy. I’ll take the kid, you get to selling something.

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ABBEY (V.O.): Yes, but what? I mean, the only thing I can do without a major investment in stock or special training is give makeovers…

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PONG, REBECCA, ANASTASIA, and ALLYN (V.O.): ( much laughter ) REBECCA: Yeah, maybe you should rethink the “special training” part of that sentence, Mom.

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ANASTASIA (V.O.): So our community lot task for the day is to fall in love with five sims on the same day. This should really not be a problem for me. Only it is being a problem, because there are only girls here. ANASTASIA (V.O.): Well, I say girls, but some of them are almost as old as Mom. What are they doing at a club anyway?

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ANASTASIA (V.O.): Ah, here we are! ANASTASIA: I’m sorry, were you talking to me? HAPLESS DORMIE: Um, no. ANASTASIA: Well, then, please start. Just kidding! On a more serious note, are you taking applications for a girlfriend?

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HAPLESS DORMIE: No, but if I ever find myself in need of a nanny, I’ll give you a call. ANASTASIA: But nannies are old ladies! HAPLESS DORMIE: Bingo. Excuse me, I have to go, uh, feed the meter. ANATASIA ( yells after him ): What meter? There aren’t any parking meters this side of Veronaville! ANASTASIA (V.O.): Okay, that was unfortunate. He’s probably gay. Oooh, but look who just walked in!

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ANASTASIA: Leonid! Hey, Leonid! REDHEADED DORMIE: Huh? ANASTASIA: Or Pong! Is it Pong? Or Leonid? REDHEADED DORMIE: Seriously? You can’t tell us apart? We look nothing alike.* ANASTASIA: Whatever. Listen, we had some really good times in college, didn’t we? REDHEADED DORMIE: …Sure… *Note from esmeiolanthe: They are exact clones, and they were both there at the time. I have no idea which this is.

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ANASTASIA: Well, what would you say to letting me buy you a drink while we talk over the good ol’ days? REDHEADED DORMIE: Yeah, no. I really don’t go for old ladies. Especially not ones who try and act like they’re still my age. ANASTASIA: What? You were at school before I was, buster, you have to be older than me! REDHEADED DORMIE: Yeah, I don’t think you really understand how it works. ’Scuse me.

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ANASTASIA (V.O.): Okay, fine! If the college guys aren’t interested -- and I don’t know why they wouldn’t be, everybody knows older women are better lovers -- then I’ll find somebody who would be thrilled to have a hot blonde interested. ANASTASIA (V.O.): Somebody like that old guy over there. Watch this.

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OLD ADAM SHANKEL: I am sorry madam, but I am still mourning the death of my dear wife. In addition, even if I were not still mourning, I tend to prefer ladies a few years older than myself. ( under his breath ) And I have never cared for mutton dressed as lamb. ANASTASIA: What was that? OLD ADAM SHANKEL: Your pardon, madam. I am… needed elsewhere. For… some worthwhile purpose.

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ANASTASIA: Hey, bartender! You don’t think I’m lamb dressed as mutton, do you? BARTENDER: No, ma’am. ANASTASIA: There, I knew I -- BARTENDER: The phrase is “mutton dressed as lamb.” It means trying to pass something off as much younger than it actually is, usually failing miserably. ANASTASIA: Are you saying that I’m a -- that I’m a -- ! BARTENDER: Let me freshen your drink, shall I?

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ANASTASIA: It’s… It’s… It’s [ beep ], that’s what it is! How could they all turn me down? I am not some pathetic middle-aged… middle-aged mountain lion !* ANASTASIA: So what if I changed my outfit? This one lets me wear a more supportive bra. And I don’t have to worry about bat wings anymore either.* You wanna make something of it? *Notes from esmeiolanthe: In American slang, a “cougar” is an attractive older woman who picks up young men. A “mountain lion” is an unattractive cougar. Both are references to large cats that stalk prey and then kill it and eat it, rather like a tiger. “Bat wings” refers to the skin that not-so-young women get on their upper arms that flops around when they raise their arm and wave.

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PONG (V.O.): One picture. One . And only because she’s aging up.

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ALLYN: Winifred told me, and she said I could tell you. She likes aliens, but not if they’re, like, super-fit. She says they look like they wouldn’t be any fun at all to hug if they’re too muscle-y. Like you’d be hugging a board or something. And it doesn’t matter if they have any money or not, because she’s going to earn all the money, so she can support whoever. Also ( conspiratorially ) she really likes underwear ads too. But don’t tell her I told you.

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ALLYN: Oh, and New Mom said I could take the call this morning for today’s task!We have to make a wish using either the genie or the well from the garden club. Only the only genie we have is the Diaper Genie that we use for Melanie’s diapers, and I’m pretty sure that doesn’t grant wishes. So we’re going to have to try the garden club.

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ABBEY: So you see, that’s why you feed Venus fly traps little bits of raw hamburger. ABBEY: Yes, I know, but they aren’t prone to E. coli , so as long as you wash your hands afterwards, it’s okay. ABBEY (V.O.): Inviting the garden club over in winter? Not the best idea in the world, but we don’t pick the tasks. I’ll do my part by talking to the trees, and everyone else is planting and tending right now, but I think our best bet for today is the community lot task.

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REBECCA: But I want to do the community lot task. It’s always either you or Anastasia. PONG: No, this makes sense. I’m only one point away from maxing logic, and since we have to max a skill, it’s perfect.* REBECCA: Yeah, well, I’m only two points away from maxing cooking. One and a half, really. I can just go to the library for a bit. *Note from esmeiolanthe: I have communitylotskilling, so this is possible on a community lot. I haven’t pulled the hack for this household because I figure this makes up for not being able to do some Free Time and Apartment Life interactions on community lots.

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PONG: And what about the garden? I planted my strawberries already. Did you plant strawberries or cucumbers? REBECCA: I planted -- REBECCA: Oh, crap. REBECCA: Yeah, I think you better be the one to go.

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PONG (V.O.): It really shouldn’t take all that long. I’m only one point away from maxing logic, and there are plenty of people to play with at the community center.

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PONG (V.O.): Chess is a game of strategy, of planning. Of figuring out what’s likely to happen and being sure that you are equipped to deal with any situation that comes up.

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PONG (V.O.): And with different opponents, you need to think differently. It’s very ( yawns ) very much a chellenge. Challenge. Not an every day thing. ( yawns ) And it’s more tiring than you’d think.* *Note from esmeiolanthe: I am leaving the typos in for Pong’s dialog to simulate the speech difficulties that happen when one is very very sleepy.

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PONG (V.O.): It’s really really tiring.

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PONG (V.O.): But it doesn’t matter how tiring I ham. How tired I get. I have to finish this for Rebecca. ( huge yawn ) Like when I used to write her papers in college. But she made it worth my while. PONG (V.O.): Was I putting these in or taking them out?

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PONG: No, something isn’t right. Why is that one pice white and all the others are black? That isn’ the way it should be, is it? PONG: Okay, I’m going to try this again. First youtake all the pieces off the board and then you put them out again and ( near tears ) What’s wrong with the set? The bishops aren’t in the right place!

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BUTTERCUP SHANKEL, VISIBLE IN THE BACKGROUND: You’re here early. Up for a game? PONG: No, thanks. I’m already playing Charlie here. BUTTERCUP SHANKEL: Who? PONG: You don’t see Charlie? Huh. He’s gone. ( yawns ) I think I need a cup of coffee. And a donut.

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PONG: They don’t have any coffee here. Just water. I don’t thin kthat’s gonna cut it. And I’m so hungry. I’m so so so hungry. Why don’t they have a vending machine? Everytwhere had vending machines don’t they? I mean, those a are a real thing, yes? Or am I going off into a hypnogogic state again?* *Note from esmeiolanthe: Hypnagogia is the state in between being awake and being asleep, where you may see/hear things that aren’t there, or see/hear things that are there, but interpret them as other than they are. For example, I once heard a lawnmower while in a hypnagogic state and interpreted it as tigers growling, even though there are no wild tigers in America.

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PONG: I’m sorry, I just can’t do this. I’m going to pass out and my blood sugar is dangerously low. I’ve got the shakes and everything. PONG: I need to go home. Now.

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ALLYN (V.O.): New Mom said I could be the one to ask for membership in the Garden Club! I’m so excited!

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ALLYN (V.O): We need the membership so we can get a wishing well. And we need a wishing well so we can make a wish.

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ALLYN (V.O.): We’re going to get today’s point because of me! This is going to be so awesome!

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ALLYN (V.O.): You mean we spent all that time and we didn’t even get a well ? What’s the point of joining if we can’t get a well? This is so not fair!

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ANASTASIA: I don’t think Allyn really understood what completing one of these tasks entails. She’ll learn.

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PONG: I really think things are only going to get better. REBECCA: Well, of course they are! We had a little setback, but we started from a good place, and we still have some credit built up. We’ll be fine. PONG: I was talking about you and me. What were you talking about? REBECCA: Um… our score. Yes. Our score. PONG: Just our score? REBECCA: I don’t have to answer that question. Tell him I don’t have to answer that question. PONG: Okay.

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Score Objectives accomplished on the home lot: 1 Objectives accomplished on a community lot: 0 Total points: 1 Total points from last time: 21 GRAND TOTAL: 22 Days played: 21 out of 100

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