Meet the family

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By: Noormahl (135 month(s) ago)

Finished!... Introduce few more ;)... LOL

Presentation Transcript

Meet the family : 

Meet the family

This is me : 

Hi there...this is me. Mom said I got all the good looks but none of the brains. I love being a babe hound. Girls make spit roll down my chin. I have a stomach problem and fart a lot. This is me

My Mom : 

My Mom My mom has lots of boyfriends. One of them has a job. She says with a little luck I could be a garbage man one day.

My brother Hank : 

My brother Hank My brother Hank is in jail right now. When he gets out he is not allowed to be around animals and kitchen appliances.

My Grandmom : 

My Grandmom My grandmom lives with us in our trailer. She smells real bad. She likes to hang out in bars and drink beer. Grandma has sores all over and they leak yellow stuff on the furniture. The flies are terrible.

My Dad : 

My Dad My mom says she is almost positive this is my dad. He lives in a Federal Penitentiary in Montana. When he gets out in 55 years we are going fishing.

My Dad’s truck : 

My Dad’s truck This is my dad’s truck. The blood stains inside are almost all gone.

My sister Jill : 

My sister Jill My younger sister Jill lost all her teeth. She was licking an eggbeater after mom made a cake and my cousin Jimmy turned it on by accident.

My brother Barney : 

My brother Barney We are proud of my older brother Barney. He is only 27 and already in the 4th grade. He wants to be a Doctor and can write his own name.

My half-brother : 

My half-brother My half brother Jim-Bob and his wife. She is a real hottie. They raise Possum in their back yard. They are not allowed to have children.

My sister Sue-Ellen : 

My sister Sue-Ellen My older sister Sue Ellen has 15 kids and they all look different. We depend on her welfare check to get by. She has a disease that makes her itch.

My sister’s boyfriend : 

My sister’s boyfriend This is my sister’s boyfriend for now. His name is Larry. He fixes lawn mowers in the city. My sister says he has a hairy butt.

My cousin Jethro : 

My cousin Jethro Jethro is my 1st cousin. He runs a tomato stand down by the highway. He once went 53 days without taking a bath.

My cousin Buck : 

My cousin Buck Buck is my second cousin. He is pretty smart. Buck is going to be a dentist some day. He does all the work on our teeth.

My best friend : 

My best friend This is Michael. He used to be my best friend but got killed by a bus on the interstate. I still wear his underwear.

The neighbourhood kids : 

The neighbourhood kids These are 2 kids we throw stuff at. There used to be 3 of them. Mom says we can't throw heavy stuff any more.

My cousin Jake : 

My cousin Jake Jake holds the park record. He once jumped over 7 trailers. Jake crashed a lot and talks real slow now. His doctor told him to wear a helmet.

My uncle Marky : 

My uncle Marky My uncle Marky is still having problems. He doesn't know what he wants in life anymore. He is a Vietnam War hero and now sells perfume at a department store.

My stepbrother Cleetus : 

My stepbrother Cleetus My stepbrother Cleetus had a hunting accident years ago. The bullet is lodged just over his right ear. It's hard to understand him sometimes and he always stinks like rotten cheese.

My twin brother Simon : 

My twin brother Simon My twin brother Simon lives in England. He plays soccer but he isn’t very good. Mom says that one day, he may get a job cleaning out toilets.

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