Traversing America

Traversing America: 

Traversing America By Gus Froese If you can read this Gus is the coolest person in the world and u have too much time on your hands

TABLE OF CONTENTS: 

TABLE OF CONTENTS Seattle Florida Everglades New York City Las Vegas Phoenix San Francisco Hoboken New Jersey Philadelphia Spokane

Place # 1(Seattle): 

Place # 1(Seattle) I have flown into Seattle which cost me a minor $130 for a one way trip (I flew on a DH8 owned and operated by Alaska airlines) I rented a car to drive to the space needle which cost me 37 ½ cents per mile. Then $15 to go to the top of the Space needle and $3 for a disposable camera to take lots of photos of the city from way up high. For Breakfast I ate continental breakfast, for lunch I ate a sandwich for $6.75 for dinner I ate a Caesar Salad for $7.50 then an Apple Salsa Roast of Filet Mignon for $41.50. I stayed at the Red lion hotel for $166.95

Place # 2(Florida Everglades): 

Place # 2(Florida Everglades) I began to drive to the wonderfully swampy Florida everglades it was a 3345.63 mile trip it took me 48 hours, 46 minutes to get there this is just the drive time I stopped every 5 minutes because I got a little bit of food poisoning from the $6.75 sandwich (which I got in Seattle) I arrived at about 4:45 in the afternoon and checked in to the Captains table Hotel for $75.00 a night I went down to the hotel Restaurant and ate a nice Seafood sampler for $15.65 it had some bits of crab, some popcorn shrimp, and some cod then I went to everglades museum to see all the things it had to offer.

Place # 3(New York City): 

Place # 3(New York City) I awoke and ate some continental breakfast then began to drive to New York City which is a 1092.0 mile drive it took me several hours I stopped for lunch at Burger king and got a burger and fries and a shake for $5.50 but other then that and a few bathroom stops I made it fairly quickly without to many stops. I arrived in New York and checked in to the Sofitel Hotel for a measly $460 a night I decided to go out and eat a really big meal at the Acqua Pazza I enjoyed a nice big salad and five slices of pizza and endless breadsticks and soda for $32.67 then I decided to go to take a tour of Liberty island to see the statue of liberty but I stopped and looked at a time share so I got to go to liberty island for free but had to be bored for five hours first. I saw a hobo village on my way to Liberty Island it was the most amazing thing I have ever seen. It was just like in the movies with the empty barrel for burning things and some dumpsters and a whole lot of greasy slimy hobos begging for money. It was almost the perfect society except they had no money but everything they had was shared equally and there was no fighting or squabbling (when I say everything I mean everything even underwear). It was like a glimpse into the past to see there primitive culture and life styles.

Place # 4(Las Vegas): 

Place # 4(Las Vegas) I drove down to las Vegas with only 12 stops because I paid a bum to drive me around as my chauffer so I could sleep in the car and I didn’t need to spend to much time eating because I ate a very big meal in new York and was able to sustain myself for a day and a half off of that meal alone. My chauffer Dunsten Ulrich Milton billingsley the xxiv (more commonly known as d.u.m.b) offered to drive me anywhere for $1 million dollars if I paid for his food so I said oky doky. Me and D.U.M.B drove into Vegas and looked at all of the pretty lights and signs we decided we would stay at the bellagio hotel and casino for only a measly pathetic $600.00 I got a big penthouse suite because why not treat myself to nice things once in awhile. I told d.u.m.b to wait and sleep in the car and he willingly obeyed because I got him a cell phone so I could call him anytime I wanted to make him bring the car around or drive me somewhere. In case d.u.m.b tried to steal my car or something I planted a G.P.S tracking device into the back of his skull when he passed out for the night so I could keep track of him at any given moment. We went to the hotel restaurant to eat dinner I enjoyed a porterhouse steak with sautéed Jerusalem artichokes for $45 dollars it was quite delicious. I gave d.u.m.b $7 to go to the candy machine to buy what ever he wanted he was overjoyed to be able to pick his feast he later returned with 2 snickers bars some corn nuts and a diet Pepsi which he ravenously ate and was perfectly content with. We said good night and I went to go play the slot machines which I played and lost about $17,542,346,739.34 dollars of bill gates money but I won a free soda and chocolate chip cookie at the snack bar so it wasn’t a total loss after all. I went to my room to sleep off the cookie and lemonade/Hawaiian punch which I got with my coupon.

Place # 5(Phoenix): 

Place # 5(Phoenix) I traveled 290 miles from Las Vegas to phoenix so I could see the historic cactuses and Acacia Park the cactuses were huge and full of juicy juice. I took d.u.m.b. to a fancy place for lunch we stopped at McDonalds and he got a kids meal and I had a big Mac this cost about $7 we ate our meal in the pleasant acacia park and watched all of the people frolicking and playing we saw a shady looking gentleman who resembled Michael Jackson watching all of the little children play. We decided to stay at the Royal Mesa Inn for $52.00 a night.

Place # 6(San Francisco): 

Place # 6(San Francisco) we awoke and journeyed to a local restaurant entitled Guedo’s Taco shop and ate two burritos the size of my forearm (that is pretty huge I mean look at these massive guns I am packing around that is impressive that they could find enough meat in the world to fill something that big I am really impressed.) Then continued on our holy quest to San Francisco which is approximately 653 miles from phoenix we checked into the San Franciscan hotel for $70.00 we drove across the golden gate bridge and saw a Broadway play for $216.00 for the two of us we saw avenue q the musical then we went to sleep and dreamed dreams of wonderful enjoyment and being crushed by a ten ton fat guy on the subway.

Place # 7(Hoboken): 

Place # 7(Hoboken) we woke up and ate some continental breakfast and started our journey to Hoboken New Jersey we enjoyed the nightlife a little bit then checked into the Park Avenue hotel for $60 and went to explore the scenic sites we stopped in to Lepore's Homemade Chocolates and got some delicious chocolates for about $5 then we went out to dinner at 3 forty grill we had Chilled 1¼ lb whole Maine Lobster for $29.00 each then we enjoyed the chocolates (from Lepore's Homemade Chocolates) we hit the hey at around 9:30 so we could watch our favorite soap operas and eat chocolate in the hotel room in our jammys (this is a total manly thing to do)

Place # 8(Philadelphia): 

Place # 8(Philadelphia) we awoke bright and early at the crack of noon to began our perilous journey to Philadelphia to get a delicious savory Philly cheese steak sandwich it was 81 miles away so it only took us about 3 hours we checked into the lovely Microtel Inn & Suites then we searched the city until about noonish to find the perfect authentic Philly cheese steak sandwich we found one at Geno’s steaks for $15.75 each then we decided to go eat something fancy at Bistro 7 we ate grilled lemon chicken for $27.64 each they were tastier then a muggins but not as good as a pcss(Philly cheese steak sandwich) we ate some breakfast at the hotel then left to go to Spokane

Place # 9(Spokane): 

Place # 9(Spokane) we arrived at Spokane which was 2145 miles away and checked into the lovely west Wynn motel for $45 then we decided to go to laser quest for an hour which cost us $26 but it was funner then shootin pickled rabbits feet in a barrel on a cold summer evenin with a banana and mustard sandwich. We decided to call it a night and went back to our hotel we got hungry around 7:30 so we went out to eat at Riverview Thai and had Tod Kratiem Prig Thai Nuah which was Tender slices of beef sautéed in a soy sauce seasoning, flavored with garlic, black pepper and garnished with cucumbers, tomatoes, and cilantro. With a side of steamed, fresh garden vegetables. This cost us $24.50 it was 12.25 each but we paid for one check it was delicious. We went back to our hotel and cashed in our chips we had a nice sleep.

The Return to Dayton: 

The Return to Dayton we awoke and drove back to Dayton it was only 96 miles and it took about three hours we parked at my house and I paid D.U.M.B and then released him into the wild. It was the funnest trip I ever went on except every other trip I ever went on in my whole life (in case you didn’t notice the trip was super lame). These are the only things in Dayton P.S if your Reading this you have too much free time on your hands and you should consider a more constructive hobby then reading tiny small print for fun

The End: 

The End Well that is the final place thanks for viewing my presentation