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Interpersonal Communication:

Interpersonal Communication Karen A. Allen Liberty University HSER-508

Interpersonal Communication:

Interpersonal Communication Interpersonal communication happens when the people involved talk and listen in ways that maximize the presence of the personal (Stewart, 2008). Communication is derived from the root commune and has two levels (Peterson, 2007). My result, Communication Skills Test

Overarching Goal (OAG):

Overarching Goal (OAG) To become a better listener and communicator

Overarching Goal…Continued:

Overarching Goal…Continued Listening is a skill that requires taking the information from the speakers, other people or ourselves, while remaining nonjudgmental and empathetic, it requires one to acknowledge the talker in a way that invites the communication to continue, and, provide limited but encouraging input to talker’s response, carrying the person’s ideas one step forward (Burley-Allen, 1995, p.3). A good listener is mindful (Sharif, 2000). Communicating effectively is a skill that must be taught and practiced and the act of listening is a large part of this skill (Campbell, Fink, 2011).

Enlarging the Conversation:

Enlarging the Conversation Meaning – communication is the process of collaboratively making these meanings Choice – All communication involves choices Culture – Culture affect communication is effected by it Identities – Involves negotiating identities, or selves Conversation – Most influential communication Nexting – Doing something helpful next, responding fruitfully to what has just happened, taking an additional step in the communication process (Stewart, 2009).

Four Types of Personality (Carbonell, 2008):

Four Types of Personality ( Carbonell , 2008) "D" - Active/Task –oriented 
Directing, Demanding,
Determined, Decisive, Doing " C" - Passive/Task -oriented 
Competent, Calculating,
Compliant, Careful,
Contemplative " I" - Active/People -oriented 
Influencing, Inducing,
Impressing, Interactive, 
Interested in people. " S" - Passive/People -oriented 
Stable, Shy,
Servant, Submissive, 

Behavioral Blend:

Behavioral Blend This is expected of me: S Graph 1 Stable and shy Enjoy pleasing people Motivated to help others Too patient and too kind This is me: C/I/S Graph 2 Passive Strong people skills Outgoing and reserved Prefer peace and harmony Uniquely You, 2012

Behavioral Blend How it influences my background: positively:

Behavioral Blend How it influences my background: positively Do what I am told Submissive Great team player Compliant and abide by the rules Carbonell , 2008, p.193

Behavioral Blend How it influences my background: negatively:

Behavioral Blend How it influences my background: negatively According to Carbonell , my This is expected of me behavioral blend, (S), my weakness is I have the willingness to carry other people’s burden, which makes me vulnerable to others that are stronger and determined to get their way (2008, p . 33). Carbonell also states, in my This is me blend (C/I/S), I can sometimes be negative or critical (2008, p . 195).

Potential Barriers:

Potential Barriers The Faker Someone that pretends to listen when their minds are actually off on a flashing tangent (Burley-Allen, 1995). My Goal: To listen at a level 1 The Interrupter Feels anxious when unable to say what is on the mind Takes the conversation off on unrelated tangents to avoid the issue being discussed (pp. 61-62). My Goal: To listen using the TLC The Self Conscious Listener Gives attention to themselves as participants ( p . 63) . My Goal: Focus on the talker to gain better understanding

Internal Noise Pollution:

Internal Noise Pollution Internal Pollution Hearing what you want to hear Biased listening Solution Apply focusing skills and invest my time and energy in the speaker Reflecting on what the speaker is saying

External Noise Pollution :

External Noise Pollution External Pollution Time pressure, deadlines Children playing Electronic devices Solution Time management Establish a time to work when the children are away or sleeping Turn off televisions, cell phones

Plan of Action for OAG:

Plan of Action for OAG My Overarching goal is to become a level 1 listener To improve my listening skills it will take practice in order for those skills to become efficient Talker Listener Card (TLC)

Plan of Action for OAG:

Plan of Action for OAG Find areas of common interest Take the initiative Work at listening Focus attention on ideas Make meaningful notes Resist external distractions Hold rebuttal Keep an open mind Summarize Practice regularly Analyze Nonverbals Evaluate Critical Content Burley-Allen, 1995, pp. 121-123


Conclusion John 1:19 Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.


Reference Burley-Allen, M. (1995). Listening the forgotten skill. A self teaching guide . (2 nd e.d ). New York, NY: John Wiley & Sons Inc. Campbell, R., & Fink, L.. (2011). The power of the listening ear. English Journal, 100(5), 66-70. doi : 2336164971 Carbonell , M. (2008). How to solve the people puzzle. Understanding personality patterns. Blue Ridge, GA: Uniquely You Resources Peterson, J.C. (2007). Why don’t we listen better? Communicating and Connecting in Relationships . Portland, OR: Peterson Publications Sharif, R.Z. (2000) . Mindful listening . The Zen of Listening: Mindful Communication in the Age of Distraction , pp. 27, 33-35, 105-115 and 248 Stewart, J. (2012). Bridges not walls. A book about interpersonal communication . (11 th e.d ). New York, NY: McGraw Hill Uniquely You (2012). Uniquely you professional profile report , Retrieved from www.myuy.com

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