Fatguys3

Slide1: 

From the dawn of man, we have always tried to marry women that were out of our league – a trophy wife, if you will. As evidence of this, history is speckled with examples of this behavior:

Slide2: 

The Flintstones

Slide3: 

The Honeymooners

Slide4: 

Family Guy

Slide5: 

The Simpsons

Slide6: 

The King of Queens

TheFat Guys with Hot WivesClub: 

The Fat Guys with Hot Wives Club

Slide9: 

My Stupendous Self

Elementary School: 

Elementary School Spelling Bee Champion of the 5th Grade

The High School Years:Fast Times at Central High: 

1990-1994 Debate Team Graduated with Honors Quiz Bowl Football Team #74 The High School Years: Fast Times at Central High

The College Years: 

The College Years Mott Community College (1994-1996) Full Scholarship University of South Carolina (1996) Home of Hootie & the Blowfish University of Michigan-Flint (1997 - 1998) (1999 - 2000) (2004 - 2006) Graduating in May…hopefully.

My Current Life: 

My Current Life Married Job – Floral Transport Navigation Specialist Voted Republican in the last election Ronald Reagan was my favorite president Three Cats: Ms. Hercules Bojangles B. A. Baracus Magdelina May

My Short-Term Goals: 

My Short-Term Goals Pass Spanish and Graduate Take a Playwriting class this Spring Move to California this Summer Find a Decent Job Have a little brat or two within the next couple years.

My Short Short-Term Goals: 

My Short Short-Term Goals Go to Spanish class today. Have lasagna for dinner tonight. Return “Derailed” to the video store before I have to pay another late fee. Pay late fee for “Chicken Little”. Watch the “Judge Judy” episodes I taped last week. Be in bed by 11:30PM tonight.

Long-Term Goals: 

Long-Term Goals To be the Bette Midler of comedy To create and write for a TV show – preferably comedy Have a harem of brunettes and redheads. Marry Leah Remini ….maybe one day

Goals for Financial Success: 

Goals for Financial Success

My Lovely Wife: 

My Lovely Wife Diana Went to ORU in Tulsa, OK Majored in Classical Piano ½ ½1/2 Asian Met in a Seinfeld chat room Proposed at a karaoke bar Supportive Uncanny Talents

Slide19: 

What Makes Me Tick???

Hobbies  Preoccupations & ObsessionsMy Top Sevens: 

Hobbies Preoccupations & Obsessions My Top Sevens

Slide21: 

Top Seven Bands / Musicians: Hootie & the Blowfish Rob Zombie Johnny Cash Pearl Jam Son Volt Guns ‘N Roses Nirvana

Top Seven TV Shows:: 

Top Seven TV Shows: Seinfeld Curb Your Enthusiasm The Office The Shield Scrubs King of Queens Judge Judy

Favorite Movies: 

Favorite Movies Monty Python and the Holy Grail Airplane! Dumb & Dumber National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation The Jerk Falling Down Rambo

Hobbies & Interests: 

Hobbies & Interests Writing, Blogging & Myspacing Watching TV Trying to crack the lottery’s “random” number system Thinking of passive aggressive methods for dealing with our rude & obnoxious neighbors Watching horrible & cheesy ‘B’ horror movies Making fun of people Conspiracies

Seven Things that Make Me Laugh: 

Seven Things that Make Me Laugh Watching little kids run and fall down My wife’s quirks Stupid jokes Groin hits on America’s Funniest Home Videos July 5th Inappropriate Moments Democrats

My Seven Greatest Moments: 

My Seven Greatest Moments Spelling Bee Champion – 5th Grade Getting Married to Diana Getting Booed off stage at a karaoke bar Being the cause of the most talked about and most awkward day in my Creative Writing class. Getting an A+ on a paper for Dr. Kollman First row seats at a Hootie concert at Soaring Eagle Taking 5 classes last semester and working 50 hours a week and still getting a 3.75.

Seven Things I’ve Never Done: 

Seven Things I’ve Never Done I’ve never seen any of the classic Disney cartoon movies. I’ve never been drunk I’ve never been injured I’ve never had a really good pickle I’ve never had a fatal illness I’ve never read an entire book from cover to cover I’ve never met a Chinese buffet that I didn’t like.

My Cheat List: 

My Cheat List Leah Remini Anita Barone Jenna Fischer Stacy Keibler Wilma Flintstone Patricia Heaton The purple haired girl at Coffee Beanery

Guilty Pleasures: 

Guilty Pleasures Beyonce’s Check on It The View Kelly Clarkson Delilah on Cars 108 at night WWE 80’s Hair Bands The Pussycat Dolls

Degree of Up-edness:Opposing Viewpoints: 

Degree of Up-edness: Opposing Viewpoints

Seven Favorite Comedians: 

Seven Favorite Comedians Mitch Hedberg Jerry Seinfeld Bob Newhart Lenny Bruce George Carlin Steven Wright Dennis Miller

My United Nations of Friends: 

My United Nations of Friends Diana – Korean Ken – Jewish Sunita – Indian Dave – Central American Dennis – German Me - American

Favorite Songs: 

Favorite Songs Anything by Hootie & the Blowfish Cocaine Blues – Johnny Cash Like a Prayer – Madonna Turn Back Time - Cher November Rain – Guns ‘N Roses Thunderkiss ’65 – White Zombie Black – Pearl Jam